I was driving the other day behind a raggedy truck with rocks piled in the back. Every bump in the road sent a few flying, and I swear my whole body locked up. My brain went straight into overdrive, “Puleeease rocks, stay in place! Don’t hit my windshield! I know it! Any second now, one of those rocks is gonna smack my windshield!”
And I could already see it happening—the crack starting small, then stretching across the glass, me calling insurance, sitting in some dusty lobby hoping the repair was covered, then days later praying another invisible tiny crack wouldn’t spread when the weather changed. My mind was out ahead of me, already living the damage before it even showed up.
That’s what anticipation does. It’s exhausting. It’s heavy… and it doesn’t take an actual rock—it just takes the threat of one.
That moment took me right back to a former boss. The day he yelled at me—in public, loud, sharp, cutting in a way that stuck deep. I was so embarrassed, and I didn’t even do anything wrong. After that, every time he called me into his office, I braced myself, replayed the yelling, and imagined the words before they were spoken. I carried dread like armor.
He didn’t even have to raise his voice again—the residue of that one moment followed me, just like the rocks flying off that truck.
And here’s the soul of leadership right here: emotions don’t evaporate just because the meeting ends. People carry them-Fear, intimidation, and anxiety linger. They stack. They pile up. When leaders fail to manage their emotions or character, they become the truck that leaves everybody else dodging flying debris.
But here’s the other side of that coin: a leader who exhibits self-control and empathy can lower that anticipatory dread. This type of leader is one who people can exhale around, rather than bracing against. Because leadership isn’t neutral, you’re always leaving something behind. Rocks—or trust. Fear—or safety. Cracks—or clarity.
Reflection for Leaders
Think about the last meeting you led—did people walk away more confident, or more cautious?
How do you or how would you create an environment that ensures that team members will feel freer to take risks after talking with you, or are they more afraid of making mistakes?
In tense moments, how do you want to be remembered for steady guidance—or for words that left cracks people are still carrying?
Call to Action: Remember, emotions and character are the SOUL OF YOUR LEADERSHIP and it shows up in the impressions you leave. One careless word, flippant glance, one outburst, one unchecked sigh—that’s all it takes to chip the glass. But it can also be the pause, the calm, the decision to prioritize people and the choice to lead with character that clears the path ahead. Secure your emotions. Check your character. Drive like people’s safety depends on it—because it does.
